2019 – Mental Goal #1

I Was Antisocial

The following was my plan to become more social, and to grow beyond my comfort zone

What Is The Problem?

I don’t try hard enough to be around other people. I know it’s difficult for me, but that’s not really an excuse. I know I’m better at it than I give myself credit for, so hopefully by working at it I can build the confidence I need to find being social easier

This will help with all future things I do, nobody likes a loner, and this will help make me a better friend, coworker, leader. 

What Am I Going To Do?

Becoming an RL (Residential Leader, at Deakin’s student accomodation) was the first major step for this. Being responsible for ~40 people, organising events, being around them, will do wonders to develop these skills. 

Beyond RL, I will sign up for more clubs, and make my best effort to attend them. DISC (Deakin Information Security Club), the environmental club, the software dev club. Being around like-minded people will be awesome, and again will help me develop  these skills

I will also reach out to people in my classes, form study groups, try my hardest to not work alone

What Will Success Look Like?

Success will look like me wanting to spend time with the people I surround myself with outside the ‘designated’ times.

Success will look like me wanting to spend time with people, full stop. It will look like me being confident talking to, and approaching, new people.

Success Criteria:

  • I will want to spend time with people
  • I enjoy appraoching and talking to new people
  • I will have been an excellent RL

How Did I Do?

This was a great success. Over 2019, I spent far less time alone in my room than I had in 2018. I made the effort to hang out in common spaces, actively organising things to do with friends, and enjoyed it.

Part of the RL position was welcoming residents on move-in day. This involved appraoching and engaging hundreds of new students, and parents, on what is often a stressful day for them. This was like jumping in the deep end, but it worked. Over this day, my confidence grew astronomically, and I still have no problem talking to new people of my own accord.

I was a great RL. I got selected to take part in leadership training with Residential Asssitants (RAs) from Kent State University, demonstrsting my skill and potential as a leader. I helped organise events (Pride Week events, movie nights, barbeques, house meetings, etc.), which received great feedback.

Through setting this goal, I became far more social, which has had continuous benefits. I still enjoy my own company, and don’t need to be the center of attention. I am very much an introvert still.

But now I know that I have the skills and capabilities to step into an extroverts shoes as needed. I maintained important parts of myself, while improving a weakness, which is what self help is all about.

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